Disposable Lover

[biguycancun]

So... For the second time since I moved back to the States, my lover has died. I guess it's part of the price of getting older. I came home and found him on the floor, his face contorted, drooling and making gestures with his right arm. An obvious stroke. The ambulance came quickly enough and I found myself in the waiting room among other relatives and friends of the stricken. Later that morning I went back to his place, our place, scrolled through his address book, found his son's number and called him at his office in Chicago. He would arrive the next day.

I spent the night in the waiting room, surviving on vending machine coffee, waiting for someone to inform me of what was happening. The military grade nursing staff would not allow me to see him and had no news other than he was seriously ill. Finally, at around 5:30 am a guy with a stethascope hanging around his neck came into the waiting room and confirmed the nurse's whispered diagnosis, he was seriously ill and fighting for his life. I still couldn't see him. I scooted back to my perch, nursing yet another awful cup of coffee.

Sometime later that morning a pudgy, pasty and sweaty guy, in an orange t-shirt, Bermuda shorts, balding with flaming red hair and Coke bottle eyeglasses came strutting into the waiting room shouting, "Is there a Mel here?" I stood up and walked over stuck out my hand and said, "That's me". Ignoring my hand he then says, quite loudly, "So. you're the cocksucking fag he's been shacked up with?" After a night of bad coffee and trying to be comfortable on a chair designed to discourage sitting, the red mist descended over me and I answered, almost as loudly, "Yeah, that's me. I usually take it up the ass after I suck him off. Why don't you go fuck yourelf?" and then I turned my back on him and retreated to the farthest corner of the waiting room.

As the day wore on more relatives showed up, eventually monopolizing a corner of the waiting room and receiving the total attention of the stethascope squad to my total exclusion. Every once in a while I hostile glare was shot at me, but not a word was spoken. The fag in the corner didn't count anymore. Through the next day and a half the standoff in the war zone continued until a couple of white coats huddled with the knuckle draggers and I could tell by the crocodile tears that it was over. He was gone.

The mob retreated, probably to make the arrangements and rifle his apartment. Whatever I left there they could have. I would never return. I suspect some of them will find use for the dildos, butt plugs and panties. I didn't feel like going back to my empty apartment, so with another 75 cent cup of something resembling coffee I curled up on the unseatable seat lloking for the will to leave the air-conditioned comfort of the uncofortable waiting room for the sweaty walk home.

I must have slept for a while and then became aware of a whitecoat standing above me. I looked up to see that he was offering me a cup, a real cup, not some recycled cardboard, a real cup of coffee. He was tall, quite Black, and good looking. I took the proffered cup from his hand. It was real coffee, hot and good. "Thank you", I said. He smiled and said, "You're welcome. Are you the cocksucking fag I heard about?" "That's me", I replied. He sat down next to me and said, "I guess we have something to talk about". We're going to meet for dinner in a week or so. Who knows where that will go.

[Footstep40]

That’s utterly heartbreaking that this is still a thing. I am so very sorry for your loss. Sending you a virtual hug.

There are a few members of my husband’s family that would sadly and gleefully try to pull the same stunt should something happen to him. I have paperwork haters. We have been disinvited from family gatherings, and he’s had some pretty heated conversations with them, it’s one of his uncles and a brother that have the issue, they think we’re of the devil and all that shit. Oh the names that they have called us, and accusations are abhorrent. I thought I chalked it up to their living in Texas and misunderstanding Jesus, but I guess it’s everywhere.

Again sorry for your loss.

[MAcpl69]

So sorry for you loss. And more sorry that a sad and life changing situation was handled the way it was by who ever was there. Remember the good times, it sounds like he would want you to be as happy you can for the rest of your life.

[KDaddy23]

My condolences for your loss. A pat on your ass for (a) not punching that guy out that called you that and (b) having the courage to stay there even though you were obviously being excluded.

[bob onit]

Sorry for your loss

[csreef]

Firstly, I'm sorry for your loss.

I hope that the date with the Doctor goes well. Please keep us updated as to what is happening.

[SAW1969]

My condolences

[redngoldpride]

I am very deeply sorry for your loss
And you should be very proud of yourself for being the best and biggest person there , if any of them truely cared about your lover and partner set aside any ill feelings and just be human.
You take care of yourself and remember him , talk to him when you need you can reach out to another when things get rough and I know how rough it can get
GOD BLESS

[remington12369]

Yeah, it never ceases to amaze me how inhumane the human race can be. Sorry for your loss. Hopefully the Doc can reinstate yours and our faith in humanity!

[Fiddlestyx]

I am so sorry not only for your loss, but for the abuse and disrespect that followed in its wake. I hope you find peace and a new path in life.

[biguycancun]

It's been a couple of weeks since my encounter with the handsome and sympathetic doctor I met at the hospital after my lover's passing. Just as I was working up the nerve to call him, he called me. We have a dinner date for next Saturday. I'm looking forward to an understanding ear and maybe something more. Did I mention he's very handsome? To tell the truth, in my long and very varied sexual history, he's only the second Black man I've ever been involved with. And again, in truth, that first man lived up to the cliche about Black men's cocks. Painful and difficult at first, yet sad to see it go later. Anticipating this time with just a bit of trepidation. He's a big man, taller and a bit heavier than me. Will the cliche hold true? Will we even get that far? Who knows? One day at a time...

[BigAlNYC]

It's not easy to make me cry, but this did it. It reminded me of the same sort of disrespect and exclusion that happened to gay people I knew when their lovers were ill or dying. Never mind the fact that some of these people had been together and caring for each other for years or decades, the families (who had mostly ignored their gay brother or sister for years) waded right in, took over by legal fiat, and excluded or ignored the one person who truly loved their relative because he/she was the "wrong" gender. Then, when it was all over, they also felt entitled to go to their home and help themselves to whatever spoils they desired. Sickening and heartbreaking. I am so sorry that this happened to you, in this supposedly more enlightened age. It sounds like you were very much the bigger person, but that is of little consolation I know when face to face with ignorant bigotry and the unrecoverable loss of a loved one.

[Footstep40]

There was an HBO movie called If These Walls Could Talk 2, it’s 3 stories about 3 different lesbian couples. The first story is about an older lesbian couple living together, one of them dies from a stroke, and the family of the deceased lady, is oblivious that she was a lesbian, believing that her partner was a roommate, they decimate the poor widow’s life and memories with disgusting callousness. They even boot her out of her home. It takes place in 1961, so it sadly fits. Seeing something like this in 2025, is more heartbreaking.

[iamcontent]

I remember that story was so sad

[biguycancun]

As some may recall, I had a date with a rather sympathetic and handsome doctor I met at the hospital on that very lousy day. We arranged to meet on neutral territory, a small restaurant near the hospital. where we had a cozy and satisfactory meal. The conversation was wide ranged, but inevitably worked it's way to sex, arriving at an invitation to his apartment, again, near the hospital.

I won't bore you with the long winded description of drinks and making out. He is a wonderful kisser and obviously knows his way around the human body. We mutually undressed and I have to admit that he lived up to the cliche about Black men's cocks. Made my little thing look like a miniature. I had trouble getting my mouth around it, but I persisted, even though there was no way to take him in completely without strangling myself. When he came, it was a reasonable amount of cum and I no difficulty swalling it all. When we kissed he licked my lips.

He suggested we retire to his bedroom, and I expressed my doubts and fears about the size of his manhood. He just said he promised not to hurt me and let's see what develops. What developed was one of the best total body massages I've ever received and then a gentle application of lube followed by a thoroughly enjoyable finger fucking, and then more lube and an equally enjoyable two-finger fucking which had me gasping in sexul heat and then another finger which ran me right up to the edge and had me begging to be fucked.

His initial entry was very slow as he asked if I was okay. Then he penetrated me a bit more, inquiring as to my confort with every forward thrust, and finally grabbing my hips and hoisting me to my knees, he withdrew a little and said he was going to fuck me. And he did, balls deep. I have never been fucked so wide and so deep, and he kept thrusting until he acheived full speed and I was insane with pleasure. I came first, follwed very quicky by him, and when he finally withdrew from me I felt an actual sense of loss.

I think I've been spoiled by him and have been turned into what's called a size queen. We have another date setup for next week. As a department head, his schedule is tough, so we have to dance around to a bit accomodate it. But I can't wait to have that cock inside me again. And that's besides his being a really neat person. Smart, funny, kind and considerate. But what a great cock!

[bikurinpa]

As some may recall, I had a date with a rather sympathetic and handsome doctor I met at the hospital on that very lousy day. We arranged to meet on neutral territory, a small restaurant near the hospital. where we had a cozy and satisfactory meal. The conversation was wide ranged, but inevitably worked it's way to sex, arriving at an invitation to his apartment, again, near the hospital.

I won't bore you with the long winded description of drinks and making out. He is a wonderful kisser and obviously knows his way around the human body. We mutually undressed and I have to admit that he lived up to the cliche about Black men's cocks. Made my little thing look like a miniature. I had trouble getting my mouth around it, but I persisted, even though there was no way to take him in completely without strangling myself. When he came, it was a reasonable amount of cum and I no difficulty swalling it all. When we kissed he licked my lips.

He suggested we retire to his bedroom, and I expressed my doubts and fears about the size of his manhood. He just said he promised not to hurt me and let's see what develops. What developed was one of the best total body massages I've ever received and then a gentle application of lube followed by a thoroughly enjoyable finger fucking, and then more lube and an equally enjoyable two-finger fucking which had me gasping in sexul heat and then another finger which ran me right up to the edge and had me begging to be fucked.

His initial entry was very slow as he asked if I was okay. Then he penetrated me a bit more, inquiring as to my confort with every forward thrust, and finally grabbing my hips and hoisting me to my knees, he withdrew a little and said he was going to fuck me. And he did, balls deep. I have never been fucked so wide and so deep, and he kept thrusting until he acheived full speed and I was insane with pleasure. I came first, follwed very quicky by him, and when he finally withdrew from me I felt an actual sense of loss.

I think I've been spoiled by him and have been turned into what's called a size queen. We have another date setup for next week. As a department head, his schedule is tough, so we have to dance around to a bit accomodate it. But I can't wait to have that cock inside me again. And that's besides his being a really neat person. Smart, funny, kind and considerate. But what a great cock!

I had a black man who was a super kisser and was well hung, it took a while to get it all the way in me, but he did take his time and went balls deep in me and shot his nuts in as deep as he could get it and it felt so good, I wish I could find another black man like he was, but he moved away!

[csreef]

As some may recall, I had a date with a rather sympathetic and handsome doctor I met at the hospital on that very lousy day. We arranged to meet on neutral territory, a small restaurant near the hospital. where we had a cozy and satisfactory meal. The conversation was wide ranged, but inevitably worked it's way to sex, arriving at an invitation to his apartment, again, near the hospital.

I won't bore you with the long winded description of drinks and making out. He is a wonderful kisser and obviously knows his way around the human body. We mutually undressed and I have to admit that he lived up to the cliche about Black men's cocks. Made my little thing look like a miniature. I had trouble getting my mouth around it, but I persisted, even though there was no way to take him in completely without strangling myself. When he came, it was a reasonable amount of cum and I no difficulty swalling it all. When we kissed he licked my lips.

He suggested we retire to his bedroom, and I expressed my doubts and fears about the size of his manhood. He just said he promised not to hurt me and let's see what develops. What developed was one of the best total body massages I've ever received and then a gentle application of lube followed by a thoroughly enjoyable finger fucking, and then more lube and an equally enjoyable two-finger fucking which had me gasping in sexul heat and then another finger which ran me right up to the edge and had me begging to be fucked.

His initial entry was very slow as he asked if I was okay. Then he penetrated me a bit more, inquiring as to my confort with every forward thrust, and finally grabbing my hips and hoisting me to my knees, he withdrew a little and said he was going to fuck me. And he did, balls deep. I have never been fucked so wide and so deep, and he kept thrusting until he acheived full speed and I was insane with pleasure. I came first, follwed very quicky by him, and when he finally withdrew from me I felt an actual sense of loss.

I think I've been spoiled by him and have been turned into what's called a size queen. We have another date setup for next week. As a department head, his schedule is tough, so we have to dance around to a bit accomodate it. But I can't wait to have that cock inside me again. And that's besides his being a really neat person. Smart, funny, kind and considerate. But what a great cock!

Ooo La La,! I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU !!!!