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[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I've written here many times that, um, I was no stranger to the "I" word and a lot of the kids I grew up with weren't either. It wasn't that we didn't know it was bad and evil because we did; our parents went out of their way to make sure that we weren't having sex with our siblings and without really thinking that by telling us not to do it, we were gonna find out why. Parents were more worried about incest than they were about us having sex with our friends and they were very much on the lookout for any signs of it.

What I used to wonder was did they know what was really going on and, unless someone got busted, would just let it happen and while keeping an eye out for signs of trouble, like it was being forced or coerced? Were they of a mind to let the experimentation go on for a bit of time before stepping in and, in some way, putting a stop to it or did they know that it might happen but wasn't going to happen for very long?

And, yeah: I'd be wondering this while having sex with my brother and my older sister and two of my first cousins - male and female - which is, by law, quite illegal. I would wonder, "Why is this bad? I love my brother and sister (and cousins) and didn't they tell me that you should only have sex with someone you love?"

Yeah... they did. But I'd eventually learn why this is so taboo and forbidden - birth defects and some pretty horrific ones. But it's like what my sister told me once day when we were about to have sex and I voiced a concern about it: "As long as you don't get me pregnant, I don't see the problem with it. Now, eat my pussy..."

Obviously, boys can't get each other pregnant - but that didn't get us a "get out of jail free card" for having sex because this was the other taboo and forbidden thing we were told not to do. I wrote that, at first, I didn't want to have sex with my brother but he bugged me so much about it that I caved in and we did it... and we didn't look back or regret any of it and even when we eventually got caught in the act.

My sister and I stopped having sex with each other exactly one week before her boyfriend got her pregnant... but one day, many years later, we had sex for "old times' sake" and neither of us thought it was all that weird - and she couldn't get pregnant so that probably had something to do with it as well.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[SIZE=3][FONT=verdana]Hands down, it is one of the most taboo and forbidden things on the planet. It is the dirty little secret that humanity never wants to admit to even though we know that it has always happened and there's not a whole lot that can be done to prevent it. We have strict laws about who can have sex with whom and we have a naivety where children are concerned in that we think and believe that there's no way they know anything about sex...

And then, in some way, find out that they know more than you think they did and because, sometimes, brothers, sisters, cousins, other family members introduce each other to sex. We have a funny way of dealing with this very large elephant in the room: As parents, we will do everything we can think of to keep our children from finding out about sex... but while also teaching them to love and care for each other. We wind up "sneaking" to have sex with our partner when the kids are presumably asleep or not even in the home and sometimes we don't realize that they know what we're doing - how many parents have been having sex and had a kid barge in on them?

We worry about our kids finding out about sex from their friends... and, perhaps, not considering that if their friends know about sex, they learned it via the "I" word. What we don't think about so much that children are pretty smart, observant, and very curious. Brothers and sisters tend to see each other in various states of undress and, indeed, it wasn't uncommon for brothers and sisters to bathe together, well, until they got to be a certain age and children don't have filters so much and if they know that boys and girls can have sex, that means [B]all[/B] boys and girls can... even if they're brother and sister. The kid logic says that if boys and girls - brothers and sisters - can have sex, then brothers can with brothers and sisters can with sisters, too.

And despite all the warnings and threats to not even think about this, it happens. Maybe just once. Maybe more than once. It's the thing that scares the shit out of parents.[/FONT][/SIZE]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]This is who I am and what the event that took place 56 years ago has taught and molded me. It's what I've learned by doing and by other means. I know the truth of it. Pretty much all of it. The rules and why they exist and why they're broken and in the way they can be broken including the dreaded "I" word; that just proves that anyone can be fair game... if they're willing to be. It's boys forever being boys. What I did in my youth [B]does count and matters[/B] and that's just the fact of shit. It's not two different things - it's all the same thing and the only difference is, well, I'm all grown up now.

I don't lie to myself; I don't kid myself into believing that what I did when I was 10 "never happened." I did it. Whether cum was involved or not. Because the truth is that you don't need cum to validate that it happened. I can't even say that I "didn't know what I was doing" because I did know... because I was told not to ever do it. What I didn't know, at the moment that man slid his prick into my mouth, was what was gonna happen and didn't know if I was gonna like it or not. Found out what happens. Found out that I liked it - a lot. I still do. I'd do it again if I could. No shame. No regrets about any of it. Would I still have sex with my brother if he was alive? Probably. Hell, I recently saw my cousin at my mother's funeral two weeks ago and if he, by some chance, wanted to do it, I would have been okay with it. I do have morals and there are things, again, I won't ever do... it's just that 56 years being like this has taught me some hard truths about having sex, well, with anyone. I really don't like guys "like that..." but I do like having sex with guys... because it's sex. He cums and I do, too - what else is really needed? I know what it's like to be in love with a guy, too, and it doesn't scare me like it did when I fell in love with him.

Because I understand, if no one else can or does, what all of this really means or what it can mean if you choose to embrace any of it. And I wouldn't want to be any way other than the way I've been for 56 years and counting. No one can take it away from me and no one will; I will be the way I am until I die - and hopefully that won't be any time soon.

I'm not as... easy as I was when I was younger but I'm not gonna make it hard for someone to have sex with me - just don't be my idea of an asshole and do not try to bullshit me because I've seen and heard it all - 56 years just makes that unavoidable.

And what 56 years of being actively bisexual has taught me.


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[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]No fantasies. No preferences. No illusions of the "ideal" or "perfect" guy. No "kinks" that I find to my liking. I am, even if for my own purposes, about as real as I can be about being bisexual. I'm about as no-nonsense about it as I can be. My favorite thing to do do, then and now, is to suck dick but if/when I'm of a mind to, I will fuck and be fucked. I'm not a top. I'm not a bottom. [B]I just am[/B]. I'm neither dominant nor submissive: [B]I just am[/B] whatever I feel like being. And, fuck no: I do not suck dick to make the other guy happy; I freely admit that if I have a fault in this, I am a selfish cock sucker because 56 years of sucking dick has taught me that this ain't about you... but it is about me and what makes me happy and satisfied. If you're happy and satisfied, that does work and I do kinda don't like to disappoint if I can help it... but I know there's nothing I can do or say if you're not happy with it.

Whether you're in mouth or or in my ass, there's only one thing I want and need you to do: Cum. Bust a nut. And don't make me wait for it. Put it in me because I've had 56 years to learn that I do not like having it on me unless, by chance, it was accidental - shit happens. If you take too long, I'm not going to be happy because I'm not going to be comfortable... but if you lose it early, I'm good with that because you did, in fact, do exactly what I wanted you to do:

You put your sperm into me... somewhere. I understand the simplicity of it all. I want you to cum and, yes, the sooner, the better. And if you don't or can't cum, well, I even know why that happens. I know why you might feel guilty or feel like shit after you cum... and it's not for the reason you think it is but it's something that you just learn not to pay attention to because there's nothing you can do about it. And the one thing that being bisexual for 56 years has taught me is that I am not a girl even though I do things that girls do. I am still very much a man and male. I don't require you to be into me and I'm sure as shit not going to be your bitch and in any way that might mean. Pull your dick out. Let me suck it and cum in my mouth. And, yes, in my old age, I'm kinda picky in that if you're not gonna suck my dick - or let me have my way with you and suck your dick, we're not gonna do anything because, simply, why should you be the only one having fun with this? Fifty-six years have taught me that if you wanna fuck me, um, don't assume that I'm not gonna want to fuck you, too... because chances are good that I'm gonna want to and if you can't handle that, don't even talk to me about it.

Ever. I will not change because I don't have to. I've learned not to if I don't want to. Otherwise, sure - we can talk about it.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I know the truth. I've seen it; I'm living it. Men have sex with men. We suck each other's dicks and consume sperm; we fuck each other in the ass. It's the way it has always been and as hard as society has been trying to stop this, it continues to fail; it failed to eradicate homosexuality and it will fail in its attempts to eradicate bisexuality in both men and women. The good thing is that more and more men and women are just going for what they know in this and the bad thing is there are still many men and women who are, bluntly, just too afraid to go for what they know.

I understand it. Fifty-six years has allowed me to see how things have changed and how it's gone from being fairly easy to get some dick to being rather difficult. Guys are... picky about it. Yeah, I said it and I stand by it. They have their reasons for it and I understand them... but anything that prevents a guy from getting the dick they know they want, well, it doesn't make sense, does it? If anything, guys should be trying to make it easier to get the dick they want and need... and they're not doing that; they think that by making it easier, they're being riskier and maybe even careless and the only thing I can say about that is that for 56 years and counting, I have [B]never[/B] gotten an STD having sex with a guy or a woman for that matter. Why?

Because while I very well may be a seriously horny motherfucker, I'm not stupid. Being in the game early taught me not to let my dick think for me because I got to see what happens to some guys when they think with their dick. I'm smarter than that. I have, I'm sure, sucked more dick and been fucked by more guys than most women I know... and without anything bad happening other than maybe kicking my own ass over getting with a guy and he turned out to be the kind of asshole I want no truck with - but you can't undo it once it's done and I'm very real with myself to know that it wasn't bad until I started thinking it was bad.

These are the things I've learned in well over a half-century of being male and bisexual. I know some... shit about this because I've done it and I've made it my life-long business to know all there is to know about it and not just for myself but for anyone else I may come in contact with. I've spent the last few years sharing what I've learned and knowing that it might help someone... or it might be summarily dismissed and to that end, well, it will never be said that I didn't try to pass along what I've learned. It is a part of the legacy that I will leave behind some day and it's just me but I feel a sense of... responsibility to tell anyone who cares to listen that being bisexual isn't as bad as you think it is, that is really is normal and natural and, yes, that whatever you've been told or believe to the contrary is a lie. It's misinformation and presented by societies and cultures who would prefer that you don't know the truth of any of this.

It's not just my opinion but it is the facts as I have learned them both the easy and hard ways and, duh, I've been learning for a very long time. I know that the things that matter to a lot of guys really doesn't matter; age doesn't matter. Appearance doesn't matter. Cock size doesn't matter. Relationships don't matter and aren't really necessary and neither is dating. Gender doesn't really mean a damned thing when you know the truth of this. What does matter - what always should matter - is whether or not this is the way you want and need when it comes to being intimate with someone. Desire matters. Do you wanna do things like this? Are you really okay with not doing things the way you need to do them? This and many more things are, in truth, the only things that really matters when a guy knows that having sex with another guy is what he needs to do.

Doesn't matter how you do it and, like it or not, guys do it because, um, they like doing it. They find out for themselves what they like about it. They accept it. They're okay with it even if no one else is because it's really harmful to themselves not to be okay with it or to continue to suppress themselves. But, again, I know why some men feel that they have no other choice but to not be the way they want to be and I respect that and I'd never try to change someone's mind about that... but I know what you're missing and I'm truly sorry that you're missing out on something... wonderful. You don't need to be into a guy to have sex with him - you just gotta like him enough to want to have sex with him. Is the devil you know safer than the one you don't know?

Not really because, um, do you really know where his dick has been when it's not with you? And if you think you do, can you really believe him? Think about that one for a moment and believe that, a long time ago now, I had reason to think about this because if I don't know anything else, I know men and I do know that they will do and say anything to get you naked and in bed with them -by any means fair or foul. It make me... wary but I remain unafraid. I'm smart enough to know that I don't have to if I don't want to and that if I even get the slightest whiff of something not being right, nothing is going to happen and good luck trying to convince me otherwise... because I've had 56 years to know better. Not all guys are assholes but I know they exist just the same and I know how to deal with them.

That very first time? Seems like it was just "yesterday" when that man slide the head of his dick into my mouth and I got hooked on it and the hook got sunk deeper to taste his sperm and deeper still when he fucked against my hole and made it messy. I knew then, 56 years ago, that it doesn't get any better than to have sex this way as well as with girls. I'm okay with the word "bisexual" because that's what I am. I don't fool myself about it and I don't fuss over whether it the label applies to me or even should... because it does. It has for 56 years.

I don't buy into the hype or bullshit being thrown around today because I know and understand the truth of it all and, yeah, in a way that most people just can't learn it... or want to be bothered to learn it. I am what I've always been over all this time:

Bisexual.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]For 56 years, I've known - and have known very well - what a lot of men are just now finding out about this. Some were kinda/sorta like me in that they found out early and, yes, even when the dreaded "I" word was in play. Some are, as I like to say, late to the party and some are just now returning to the party after being absent. And, sadly, there are many more men who are sitting on the sidelines and doing nothing when, really, they want and need to.

It breaks my heart to see so many men not doing what they know they want and need to do. It's not that I don't understand why they aren't - I do understand it all too well... but I also understand that if it's something you [B]really[/B] want to do, you will always find a way to do it and by any means necessary... and, yes: Even if they have to cheat on a partner in order to do it. I see how men have become very risk-adverse; not without reason, of course, but about things that, if they really put their minds to it, those risks can be avoided and/or lessened. I've seen the fear that consumes people in this, some of it real but a lot of it imagined; I've seen so many men and women just assume the worst and living in such great fear, not so much for their own health but because of what someone else is going to say or think about them.

And I know this because I used to be like that, too, until I got around to realizing that I was being fearful of something that, really, I shouldn't be. I've lost friends because of what I am; I've been criticized and ridiculed for being the way I am... but I cannot ever stop being the way I am and I'm sure as fuck not gonna stop being the way I am because of what someone else has to say about it - and someone who, I've learned over these 56 years, really doesn't know what the fuck they're talking about and more so when they believe in the lie that is our morality... and it is a lie and one of omission if nothing else.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I know what sex really is and how it can be and I also know about love, too, and that there's the way it's supposed to be... and then there's the way it, too, can be. Being madly in love with another guy was one hell of a life-changing experience, too; it was supposed to be impossible but it really isn't because love, all by itself, doesn't give a fuck about shit like who you're supposed to only be in love with... but people do and I've learned that people are made to love in one way only and with many exceptions and difference that, when you really get down to it, doesn't make much of a difference.

Or, if you don't mind, it never matters - but it does to everyone else who can't or just won't see these things for what they really are: Being human. Being alive. I understand the rules; I know why they exist because I've spent 56 years making it my business to know because of that one question I asked myself so very long ago: How can something that's supposed to be so bad feel so good?

Because it's supposed to feel good but, nah, it didn't take me 56 years to figure that out; it actually took me about two years to figure it out and, um, right in the middle of one of my friends fucking me and putting a load of cum in my ass... and became clearer as I was doing the same thing to him. And didn't it feel right, normal, and natural? Yes, yes, a thousand times yes... because it really is. I just had - have - the advantage of figuring this out a long time ago and at a time when homosexuals were the most reviled people on the planet... but I've known all along that I might be a lot of things... but I'm not homosexual because, lest it be forgotten, I do love me some pussy and the crazy, insane women its attached to.[/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]I've spent 56 years not only having sex this way, I've also done my best to help others understand this. Sometimes it has been by having sex with them, to show them that what they believe is wrong and nasty is anything but wrong or nasty... and sometimes it's been by just telling them what I've learned over all of this time. I've been successful... and not so much at times because if I haven't learned anything else, I've learned that while anyone has the [I]potential[/I] to be bisexual, not everyone can actually be bisexual, accept it, and revel in it and as I've learned to do.

If there's a way for two guys to have sex, I've probably done it and if I haven't done it, I probably know about it - and if it's something I haven't actually done, it's because I didn't want or need to because, after all, there are some things I just won't do. I've experienced this in ways that, frankly, makes people feel some kind of way, up to and including the very scary "I" word and I've learned that as... bad as that is, it's always been the way a lot of people find out about sex. To that end, acting like it never happens or otherwise turning away and feeling disgusted only serves to hide, ignore, and deny the truth of things...

And the truth is you can have amazing sex with anyone who's willing to do it with you and the only thing that really matters is the intimacy of it and, really, being human. If there is one... regret, it's that I didn't find out about this before I did but I accept that there's a 9 year gap between my life as a bisexual and being alive - I turned 65 today and it just is what it turned out to be. I've actually been sexually active for 57 years and 57 years to the day because a girl who couldn't give me a present for my 8th birthday gave me a gift I've cherished ever since: She gave me her body. Taught me how to have sex with her. Put me directly on the path to find out that girls aren't the only people you can have sex with.

Best gift ever. To that end, I've spent all of those years thinking about how I got to where I am now and, yes - I was quite the whore about it. Anyone. Any place or time. Anything. I've spent all these years wondering if, by chance, I was some kind of fucked up in the head right out of the gate... and I really and honestly don't think that I was or that I am: I just found out about some shit and well before people usually find out about it. Found out about it. Ran like the wind with it and, again, without shame or regret.[/SIZE][/FONT]