[SIZE=3][FONT=verdana]I became sexually active at a young age and in rapid succession and once I experienced sex at the hands (so to speak) of a man, my desire to have more sex was escalated. It didn't take a whole lot of brain power to (1) figure out that this sex thing was totally amazing and (2) because I could have sex with both boys and girls, well, did it get any better than that? The very simple kid logic said that if I couldn't find a girl who'd want to do the nasty, there was always a boy who'd want to.[/FONT] [FONT=verdana]And it was fun. Naughty beyond belief. And it only got better once I was able to shoot the dreaded baby-making stuff and since I was the first among us to be able to do this, it made me very popular even if the girls I had been having sex with were now leery of doing it with me since, well, there's a reason why we called it the baby-making stuff but among us guys, it was just a very cool thing to be sucking on someone's dick and the next thing you knew, that warm, sticky, salty/sweet stuff would be shooting in your mouth or, with a guy on top of you and humping his dick in and out of your butt for all he was worth, feeling his prick jerking and twitching inside you and knowing that he was shooting the baby-making stuff in you. Some liked the feeling so much that when they felt the jerking and twitching, it would give them a bad case of the giggles and maybe because it felt so good and so weird that laughing was the only response.[/FONT] [FONT=verdana]Just way too much fun. Once I started eating pussy, the circle was now complete and even if a girl was afraid to fuck, getting her pussy licked and sucked was in very high demand and so was I; I could do it, I loved doing it, and I could do it for a long time and the "funny" thing about this was that if a girl wanted to be eaten but didn't want to be fucked, um, after eating her silly, she'd have no qualms about me sliding my dick into her and filling her overheated pussy with cum anyway.[/FONT] [FONT=verdana]But as quickly as I had discovered the joys of sex, I also discovered just as quickly that you could have sex with someone and it wasn't fun at all and it wasn't until I was well into my adult years when I'd go back into my memories and see that whenever I had sex and it wasn't fun, it was usually with another guy... and now I was getting schooled and learning why girls behaved the way they did when some horny dude was trying to fuck them.[/FONT] [FONT=verdana]It wasn't fun to have some guy manhandling me or trying to humiliate me in some way; I found out quickly and the hard way that I hated guys who'd make having sex with them unpleasant and, even worse, insulting my intelligence by using the same kinds of lies they'd use with girls and thinking that I was stupid enough to believe that if I sucked their dick, they weren't gonna cum in my mouth. Yeah, sure they wouldn't. Or they'd think I was naïve enough to believe them when they said they weren't gonna fuck me... then try to do just that... and then get pissed off when I wouldn't allow it and I'd be pissed because I'd find myself literally fighting them to keep their dick out of my ass.[/FONT][/SIZE]
So what would a typical day be like for me given that we can't go anywhere or do anything here in Ontario? I would start the day with a long shower and shaving my legs. I would glide over to the closet and pick out something that I could lounge in all day but still look sexy doing it like a long silk nightie. Most likely underneath would be some really sexy lingerie like matching bra and panties with a garter belt and stay-ups or maybe a bodysuit. I would proceed to my makeup vanity and apply the most smokey eyes you have ever seen and then finish off with a statement red lip. I would then sit on the couch and read blogs and forums all day whilst chatting with other like-minded individuals about the ins and outs of sex (Pun intended) all the while slowly drinking my coffee and getting aroused. The day would drag on with me getting increasingly aroused to the point where I will need to satisfy my urges with some sex toys on the bed. Once completed I will then lounge in my night until I fall asleep and repeat the next day.
I thought as I got older I would calm down a bit. I was not really a party animal in my younger years and that's something I don't regret at all, it's not me and never was. But I find now as I get older I seem to want to push at some things a little harder. Years ago I would never have taken any pictures of myself in a compromising position but here we are with some rather racy photos of me sitting on the hard drive. Not really sure what drove me to do it but I can say I am enjoying taking and looking at them for sure.
A.D.D. was never a thing when I was a kid but according to my wife, I have over 10 of the 15 signs of adult A.D.D. and one of them is hyper-focusing. FYI hyper-focusing is [QUOTE]Hyperfocus refers to an intense fixation on an interest or activity for an extended period of time. People who experience hyperfocus often become so engrossed they block out the world around them. Children and adults with ADHD often exhibit hyperfocus when working intently on things that interest them.[/QUOTE] So this could be the answer as to why when I get these feelings I dive right in head first without any other thoughts. I have done it with everything in my life, probably why I have over 50 lipsticks in my collection and most have not even been used yet. Also why I spent most of my workdays for the last week thinking about nothing but cock!!
I sometimes can't help but wonder if my crossdressing is attributed to my bisexuality or vice versa. This was a question I would ask myself years ago before I truly accepted myself. I hated the fact that sometimes when I dressed I would get these feelings and urges and act on them while dressed. It took me a long time to get over these and come to where I am today. I am happy no matter how I am presenting and do not have any more guilt towards my fantasies.
well i am coming out as a crossdresser. going to tell my niehbor about it. [ATTACH=CONFIG]57316[/ATTACH]
So if you read my first blog here you will see that I told my wife how my bisexual curiosity was gaining some traction and I would like to explore it more, she agreed and I proceeded to look into some avenues of finding someone to explore their feeling with. Fast forward a few weeks and we are having some sort of conversation and something got said and at that point, I knew I had really hurt my wife, which is something I really did not intend or want to do. I decided that the best thing to do would be to stop my search for a partner and try and stop thinking of this situation. But here we are almost a year later and I am back into the same feelings I had before. Although this time we had a more frank discussion. I basically said I have these feelings and I can't do anything about it. Out of the love and respect I have for her I will not pursue an IRL meeting or boyfriend but I will continue to be online chatting and talking with other people that have the same interests as me. So for the foreseeable future, there is no chance that I will act on any of my bi feelings but I can at least come here and talk with other people that feel the same way as I do. Cynthia
[FONT=verdana][SIZE=3]Ed had gotten up on very wobbly legs and stretched, giving me a good look at his body which was still flushed a very deep reddish color. He turned and looked at me and there was... something in his eyes that I couldn't make sense of; I wasn't sure if it was anger that I was seeing or not. "I always thought that I really liked sucking dick," he said as he sat back down on the bed. "I've had a lot of guys blow me... and none of them has ever sucked my cock like you just did. Shit... I don't even remember if I've ever cum three times like that before and I'm surprised that you got me to cum twice!" I could only sit there and look at him - and, this time, keeping my eyes on his face. I could feel The Beast "moving around" in its cage even though it was "slumbering;" it had been fed in a huge way and was at rest... for now. "You're still hard," Ed said, nodding at the erection I hadn't been aware of... well, not really that aware. "Oh, I guess I am," I said - and feeling kinda silly saying it. "Well, let me get something to drink - and you look like you could use something to drink that ain't cum, too," he said. "Then I'll see what I can do about that boner, okay?" Ed had already sucked me off once before The Beast and The Hunger woke up and he did a very good job sucking me but as he went down on me and began to, I'd say, show me his version of The Hunger, I was hoping that his efforts didn't wake The Beast up again but, thankfully for the both of us, it was taking a much and well deserved nap. I fell into the moment of having my dick nicely sucked and didn't flinch at all when Ed returned the favor of burying his finger into my ass; in fact, I welcomed it and more so when I did like having a finger in my ass while I was cumming and feeling my anal muscles contracting on his finger and in time with every delicious pulse until he had swallowed every drop of cum had to offer. We'd showered together and, for a moment, us washing each other almost got The Beast's attention but we got cleaned up without anything happening. As we got dressed, I had come to terms with the fact that there probably wasn't going to be a next time for us and I was pissed at not being able to contain The Beast and its ravening Hunger any better than I did or, really, couldn't. I could almost see Ed thinking about whether or not getting together to do this again would be a good thing or not and as much as I enjoyed sucking his dick - and without The Beast and The Hunger being involved - I felt sad thinking that I'd never get another chance to suck his dick. But he surprised me when he said, "I don't know about you but I think we need to do this again. You are such a damned good cock sucker!" "I hope that we can," I said, feeling relieved. "I very much like sucking your dick - and like you probably didn't notice, huh?" He laughed and I laughed as well and after agreeing on another day and time to do this again, I went home feeling happy and totally sated... but I was beginning to feel sorry for the women waiting for me at home because now The Beast was getting Hungry for their pussies... and it was going to be fed again.[/SIZE][/FONT]
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