RobUK
May 6, 2010, 1:31 PM
Hi
I'm kinda closeted right now, but I'm starting a new university course in September and I intend to be open and honest with any new friends I make.
I'm expecting to have to deal with several new issues then, and (as I don't want to be a bad person), one question I've been pondering is what to do if you're in a relationship with someone else who is already in a relationship (i.e. he/she already has a bf/gf/wife/husband/partner).
I just saw an interesting post on another site about this, and this guy said:
"I can't speak for anyone but myself, but I see a difference in who I love and how I obtain physical release.
I won't pretend to know the circumstances of the people involved, but if you're not getting emotionally involved, I see it as simply having a good time along the same lines of having a jogging buddy or someone you can watch a ballgame with.
I realize not everybody will see it the same way, and I respect that point of view, but far too many of us get hung up on what sex is and what sex isn't. Sometimes, it's a spiritual bond. Sometimes, it's just mutual masturbatory assistance.
You're not responsible for anyone's morality but your own. If you're comfortable, enjoy the ride."
This is quite an interesting opinion, as I've normally assumed the "cheating is cheating - doesn't matter if you're bi, gay, straight, or pink with yellow spots". As I wouldn't want to be in the situation where I'm being cheated on, I wouldn't do anything with a guy/girl that encourages/facilitates/perpetuates cheating on another person.
However, reading posts on this site, you soon realise that other relationships are rarely the same, and things aren't quite so simple.
Some people aren't out to the other person, and can't because of the other person's views. Others are in relationships where one or both are polyamorous, or it may be an 'open-relationship', or even a dead marriage, but the couple don't want a formal seperation for the sake of their children.
So, what do you do? If you learn the girl/guy you're messing about with is already in a relationship? What if your relationship is very loving and the other one isn't?
:confused:
Rob
I'm kinda closeted right now, but I'm starting a new university course in September and I intend to be open and honest with any new friends I make.
I'm expecting to have to deal with several new issues then, and (as I don't want to be a bad person), one question I've been pondering is what to do if you're in a relationship with someone else who is already in a relationship (i.e. he/she already has a bf/gf/wife/husband/partner).
I just saw an interesting post on another site about this, and this guy said:
"I can't speak for anyone but myself, but I see a difference in who I love and how I obtain physical release.
I won't pretend to know the circumstances of the people involved, but if you're not getting emotionally involved, I see it as simply having a good time along the same lines of having a jogging buddy or someone you can watch a ballgame with.
I realize not everybody will see it the same way, and I respect that point of view, but far too many of us get hung up on what sex is and what sex isn't. Sometimes, it's a spiritual bond. Sometimes, it's just mutual masturbatory assistance.
You're not responsible for anyone's morality but your own. If you're comfortable, enjoy the ride."
This is quite an interesting opinion, as I've normally assumed the "cheating is cheating - doesn't matter if you're bi, gay, straight, or pink with yellow spots". As I wouldn't want to be in the situation where I'm being cheated on, I wouldn't do anything with a guy/girl that encourages/facilitates/perpetuates cheating on another person.
However, reading posts on this site, you soon realise that other relationships are rarely the same, and things aren't quite so simple.
Some people aren't out to the other person, and can't because of the other person's views. Others are in relationships where one or both are polyamorous, or it may be an 'open-relationship', or even a dead marriage, but the couple don't want a formal seperation for the sake of their children.
So, what do you do? If you learn the girl/guy you're messing about with is already in a relationship? What if your relationship is very loving and the other one isn't?
:confused:
Rob